Have you ever feel like something or someone is talking to you, well in your mind that is.. Well it was normal to me until last night. I was on my bed praying my night prayer, when suddenly something came to my mind, telling me about Priesthood, all the wonders of joining them.. I hesitated to listen and think about it, turning and switching position just to find comfort on my bed to sleep, but i can't..
I told to myself, "Honestly I can't join the Priesthood, Yes, my heart is longing for Jesus but there's a deep side of me which is attracted to a female".. I was reluctant to even listen to anything about it, and yet i couldn't sleep.. It was asking me to speak to a Priest about it.. Moreover, it was stressing me about my studies, asking me to study hard first.. So Yes, immediately i spoke to one of the Priest.. Ask Him about His calling and How would one know when is the calling... He gave me a very strong point, He said " God speaks in many ways, in your heart quietly, or through your involvement in various spiritual activities. Also, it is more important to choose a spiritually mature person to be your spiritual director to help you discern".. And I was thinking to myself, is it possible? That is when i looked back and recall about last night.. Maybe, is that God? was God speaking to me? I wouldn't know.. But Rev. also said that " be open and study hard first and work awhile".. And yet, it still comes back to last night, where something stressed me about studying..
Confused and stunt, I told myself that this is all in the hands of the Lord, but I know He's always there for me..
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